“Come,” Jesus said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water, and came toward Jesus.
I am one week away from leaving to go back to the beautiful country of Rwanda. I am sad to leave my wonderful husband, who is so supportive of me and of God’s calling for me. I am also sad to leave my beautiful daughter, who also loves Rwanda as much as I do, and would prefer to come with
me. I am also excited, I am nervous, and I am eager to see what God has planned for me on this trip.
I am finding more and more that I don’t know where God is leading me and where my life will go from here. For me, this is difficult. But I try to remember every day that God’s will is much better than mine. I find courage to “step out of the boat” in knowing that God has a plan for me, plans to prosper and not to harm, plans to give hope and a future. (Jer 29:11)
Sometimes I can step out of the boat and walk confidently toward Jesus, sometimes I step out and walk as I slowly sink, and others I sink like a rock to the bottom. I want to eventually make it to where I never sink. I know I have faith in God but sometimes I struggle with trusting God, truly just letting go and letting God. But courage is about not knowing where my life will go and still going anyway. I will just say though that this is not easy, but it is worth it! To be able to see miracles every day, no matter how small, is so much better than going through the same mundane tasks day after day in fear of what God might ask me to do. I am happy I have chosen His path for my life instead of mine. Even through tears in my eyes and an ever present ache in my heart for the suffering I have seen, I can be still and know that I have helped at least a few.